Why This Conversation Mattered
Allyship is one of the most talked-about concepts in DEI- but also one of the most misunderstood. For some, it’s about speaking up. For others, it’s about stepping aside. Often, it’s wrapped in buzzwords but lacking in substance.
In Clusivity’s most resonant and practical session yet, Meera Somji hosted Chloe Duncan, DEI Business Partner at the Institute and Faculty of Actuaries, for a conversation that cut through the noise.
This webinar revealed that allyship isn’t only about power – it’s about recognising potential in unexpected places, building trust, and helping people connect the dots between what they care about and what they can do. Chloe offered tangible ways to activate allyship across an organisation – and challenged the assumption that DEI champions have to be “born ready.”
“Real allyship can be co-created. Allies can be found—and made.”
– Chloe Duncan, Institute and Faculty of Actuaries
Redefining Allyship: Not Passive, Not Performative
The conversation began with a call to reframe allyship entirely. Instead of waiting for the perfect, vocal, DEI-savvy leader to raise their hand, Chloe urged us to see allyship as a strategic mechanism—one that can be built intentionally and collaboratively.
Rather than allyship being a title someone claims, it’s a mutual process of support, listening, power-sharing, and change-making.
“I really liked the way that allyship here is positioned as the strategic mechanism with a really clear outcome. It’s not just allyship for allyship’s sake… but the transformational power of allyship.”
– Chloe Duncan
She went further, explaining that allyship has to be rooted in power awareness – because otherwise, we risk reinforcing the same hierarchies we’re trying to change.
“Only if it’s cognizant of power… and that beneficiary as someone who could define what allyship is needed… that’s such a valuable, active way of looking at it.”
– Chloe Duncan
This framing transforms allyship from a soft skill into a change strategy.
The Story That Started It All: Spot the Spark
One of the most impactful parts of the session was Chloe’s story about an unlikely ally – a senior leader who didn’t initially stand out as someone ready to champion DEI. But one moment during a team training shifted something.
“They personally had never felt that they walked into a room and didn’t see themselves represented… and they asked, ‘What can I do?’”
– Chloe Duncan
That one question was enough to start something meaningful. Chloe didn’t rush to assign tasks. Instead, she nurtured the curiosity and helped the leader reflect, ask more questions, and eventually co-design actions aligned with his influence.
“Allies can be found—and made too… it was really more about spotting that potential spark of allyship.”
– Chloe Duncan
This idea – “spot the spark”—became a golden thread throughout the conversation. Not all allies arrive ready. But with the right support, many are waiting to be activated.
“One of the most valuable things I learned is to be open to the unexpected allies… people who just need a little support to step into this space.”
– Chloe Duncan
Facilitate the Action: Don’t Just Hope for It
Chloe stressed that DEI professionals can’t afford to sit back and wait for allyship to happen organically. We have to proactively support, coach, and sometimes gently nudge people toward ally behaviour.
One powerful tactic? Ask current leaders to help identify others with potential.
“I said to a leader, ‘You know your peers really well… who might just need a bit of support to step into this space?’ That conversation opened doors.”
– Chloe Duncan
In addition to coaching, Chloe also offers practical help. She described co-writing blog posts or event reflections on behalf of leaders who wanted to show support but were unsure how to express themselves. This doesn’t dilute the message – it amplifies it, making allyship more accessible.
“I had a great conversation… I wrote it up for them, shared it, and we co-created that piece. It was still meaningful—it’s just a different way of getting to the same result.”
– Chloe Duncan
Set Expectations: Allyship Isn’t a Standing Ovation
A recurring challenge in DEI is helping leaders stay committed – even when the reaction is quiet. Chloe shared that many leaders expect a flood of positive feedback when they “do the right thing.” But the reality? Allyship often works in silence.
“They might expect feedback… but often, people just individually feel impacted. They might not say anything at all.”
– Chloe Duncan
“Only five people might join your session… but it will be making an impact.”
– Chloe Duncan
DEI leaders need to help set realistic expectations. This is slow, cumulative, sometimes invisible work – and that’s okay. It doesn’t make the change any less real.
Connecting Allyship to Identity, Empathy, and Culture
To sustain allyship, Chloe emphasised the importance of helping leaders find their emotional hook—something they care about personally, whether it’s a family connection, past experience, or simply wanting to be a better leader.
“We can communicate that allyship is needed because not everyone in our organisation is comfortable at work… They can’t thrive.”
– Chloe Duncan
“I’ve found it helpful to say: you don’t need to fix society. Your responsibility is to your own employees.”
– Meera Somji
This kind of reframing helps move DEI away from overwhelming politics and toward people-focused leadership.
Everyday Allyship: Subtle, Consistent, Cultural
Not all acts of allyship are big, loud, or public. In fact, the most powerful are often quiet, consistent, and cultural.
Chloe encouraged us to recognise the power of a well-timed interruption or an affirming follow-up in a meeting.
“Sometimes it’s the allyship of ‘Hold on, I didn’t hear the rest of their point.’ Just one sentence—but it helps someone keep speaking up.”
– Chloe Duncan
She also spoke about allyship through listening, through amplifying others, and through choosing to stay in the work, even when it’s difficult.
What About You? The Allyship DEI Pros Deserve
The final section of the webinar was a reminder to DEI practitioners: we deserve allyship, too. The work is emotional. The wins are slow. And burnout is real. Chloe shared her own strategy for staying grounded – keeping a personal log of moments that made her feel connected and impactful.
“Sometimes it’s okay to centre yourself in the narrative… What’s the allyship you need to keep going?”
– Chloe Duncan
“I keep a note on my laptop… little snippets that remind me why I’m doing this work.”
– Chloe Duncan
It’s a powerful reminder that sustainable DEI work requires support—not just systems.
Key Takeaways for DEI & HR Leaders
🌟 Spot the spark – allyship doesn’t always arrive ready
🌱 Don’t wait for perfect allies- co-create them
✍️ Make it easy – facilitate the action behind the scenes
🧠 Shift expectations – impact often happens quietly
💬 Everyday allyship matters – speak up, listen, amplify
🧭 Help leaders find their “why” – and keep your own close
💖 Ask yourself: what does allyship for you look like?
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